Snapchat: what's all the fuss about, man?

"Do you actually have a computer?" I once asked someone, instantly hoping I hadn't sounded cheeky or sarcastic. It was a genuine question. 

They'd just informed me that they weren't on Facebook. This was in, roughly, 2011. They smiled and responded that they did indeed own a computer. They probably got that question a lot.

Five years later and I'm now in the same position – or similar. 

This time it's not Facebook, but a Snapchat account that I do not possess. I'd be lying if I said I actually had any idea how it worked, apart from – from the outside at least – seeming like an overly creative version of Instagram.

Snapchat, to me, still feels like a new 'thing', and maybe it is in comparison to a phenomenon such as Facebook.

I recall lying in bed at night back in 2012 or whenever it started, and receiving a text asking if I was on this new app that everyone was going crazy about. My answer hasn't changed since then.

So why don't I have Snapchat? That's usually the follow up question that people ask now. 

"I spend enough time on my phone as it is" is always my answer. 

And it's the truth. Twitter, Instagram and Facebook take up a hell of a lot of my time. It's a blessing that I can use a separate screen to play Fifa else I'd never leave the bloody thing alone.

It's recently been playing on my mind the possibility that I might reach old age and be the only person on the planet without a Snapchat account. Or will I have given in to peer pressure by then?

It's hardly against the realms of possibility that it’ll still be around in 50 years. The early social networks may have had a shelf life (shout out to any fellow 90's kids who remember Myspace and Bebo Luv), but the current ones seem like they’re here to stay.

A conversation with one of my school pals the other day, whilst strolling through town:

Him: "Are you on snapchat? (roughly the 6th time he's asked)"

Me: "Nope"

Him: "Why not?"

Me: "I spend enough time on my phone as it is. I use the three main social networks and I can't really be bothered with anymore apps"

Him: "Sacrifice one of the ones you've already got?"

Blimey, is it really that important? He's also the same friend that once texted me a screenshot of the snapchat he'd just produced.

The thing is, I've never felt interested in getting this new app. Maybe I'd like to be interested? I really don't know. 

It genuinely doesn't bother me that I'm possibly 'missing out' most of the time. 

Meh, some people still aren't on social media altogether, and they're happy enough aren't they?

I'll admit I felt a bit frustrated earlier. My favourite radio station was asking listeners to respond to a question via Snapchat to potentially get a ‘shout out’ on air. I checked their Twitter account to see if there were any alternative routes, but nope, looks like it's the modern guys only.

The more time passes and the more times I'm asked by people who've asked several times before – maybe it's now in hope more than expectation – the more I'm starting to genuinely fear how I'd react to being on Snapchat. 

I mean, I recall when Twitter first became popular and pretty much everyone's first tweet was "what? This thing is so confusing!" Yet within two weeks they were hooked. Would that be me with Snapchat?

The fear I'm beginning to feel is that it would be just like when your grandad joins Facebook and clearly has no idea what he's doing (my own, late, grandfather still has an account. He was 93 when he passed and wasn't a natural with technology, but he gets a pat on the back for giving it a try).

I'm a 24-year-old man. Technology has risen to such an extent that I'm really not sure how I'd cope with suddenly being thrust into, what is to me, an alien world. At this moment in time I have zero intention of ever being on there, but I won't rule it out forever. 

I managed to join twitter before it became popular. That’s not to say that your Timeline in those early days consisted of a couple of footballers and some tumbleweed, but it was nowhere near the force it is today. 

I even gave in to joining Instagram, after an entire bottle of vodka in my first year of university. 

My university household this year was full of regular SC users. 

In fact, I know that I ended up having my antics posted on there a few times, and that’s pretty much the only time I’ve been tempted to join. 

But, thankfully, it hasn’t yet got to the point where stating that I still haven’t fixed myself up with an account on certain popular apps, is the cue for a Homer Simpson GIF with his hands thrown up in the air while he yells at the sky in despair. 

And, hopefully, it never will.